In an industry that is focused on building relationships, family-owned agencies have thrived and stood out amongst their peers. Knowing that you can rely on your business partner no matter what fortifies the foundation of family-owned businesses. However, without clear communication and boundaries, it can quickly become all-consuming, leading to burnout and fallout.

I spent five years running an independent insurance agency with my mother. And while we enjoyed substantial growth and success, it didn't come without years of tension, miscommunication and unchecked boundaries. We made the false assumption that because we're family, we would somehow organically find our flow as business partners.

I realize now that there were several crucial conversations that we should have had in the beginning that would have allowed us to capitalize on our strengths and take the agency to new heights.

Here are four areas to address to run a successful family-run agency:

1) Delineate responsibilities. Before you bring any family member into your business, you must decide whether there's a place for them in your organization where their skillset will bring value. If there is, the next step is to decide if you're ready to delegate the tasks and responsibilities associated with the role.

This isn't an overnight process. Both you and your family member must be committed to making this transition happen from the very beginning. Don't rely on the fact that you both are dedicated to each other because you're family. Much like your other employees, family members need ownership and a clear path to growth to feel motivated to work with you. Otherwise, you'll endure years of tension that only leads to resentment and complete dissociation.

When I first joined my mom's agency, we never gave ourselves the opportunity to discuss what my responsibilities would be in the business. My “role" was to be a fixer for the business' problems—the customer relationship management system, personnel issues, our broken customer service process and just about anything else that loosely fell under “operations."

Though I succeeded in resolving these issues and streamlining our business, it was an uphill battle to initiate and implement any of these changes. The pattern was always the same: I would present a solution to a problem to my mom, she would “think about it," and I would come back and explain it differently until we'd reach a point where we'd finally compromise.

The common theme was that I had to constantly fight to get buy-in from her to initiate any changes. While pushback is expected, it hindered the business when the reason wasn't because of the quality of the solution, but rather because she wasn't emotionally ready to make this change in her business. After all, she'd been running it her way for over 15 years before I showed up.

If you're going to bring in a family member into your agency, decide if you are willing and able to get out of their way for them to grow. Once you do, follow the same procedure that you would with an employee: create a contract and make it clear what each of your realms of responsibility will be. Then, both of you will be able to thrive without dissolving your relationship.

2) Respect the perspective each generation brings. In our ever-evolving world of work, the longevity of your business is almost completely dependent on how quickly you can keep up with new trends and implement technology. However, this doesn't mean that years of knowledge and experience are irrelevant. Bringing in a younger family member is a unique opportunity to apply new ideas that can take your business to the next level.

The key here is to have the same goals for the business. That way, you are both working toward the same North Star and can be flexible about the methods you choose to get there. This is the most crucial decision—because if you're both working to create two different versions of the agency, your generational differences will not only divide you further, but the disconnect will be apparent to your staff and clients.

Once you are on the same page, it often becomes a question of pride and how much of it you're willing to give up. The best way to handle these types of conversations is to enter them with the intention to be curious and learn. If you're the younger generation, then your attitude when presenting new ideas should focus on the desire to educate and bring value. As soon as it becomes about the right and wrong way to do something, any hope of trying to make a positive change and move the business forward is lost.

The way that you initiate, present and follow up on suggestions and ideas makes all the difference. After a couple of years of feeling like my ideas were falling on deaf ears, I changed the way I held these conversations. Each generation prefers a different tone, style, time of day and communication method. Once I became aware of this and set aside specific meetings for us to be fully present with one another, I was able to quickly and effectively obtain my mom's endorsement.

3) Set clear boundaries for communication. Keeping your personal and professional relationships separate is the most challenging aspect of working with family, but it is also the most crucial. Bear in mind that the expectation that you have of your son, daughter, sister, mother or father as a professional is completely different from your expectation of them as your family member. They will never be able to meet both of these expectations at the same time, so it's key to distinguish them as two separate individuals.

Each of you only has so much energy that you can allot to being a business partner and to being a child, parent or sibling. Be mindful of how much time and energy you take from one another's personal roles to fulfill professional obligations. Just because your family member would answer the phone any time you needed help—because they're family—doesn't mean you should take advantage of this for business purposes.

This goes hand-in-hand with feedback conversations with your family member. It's easy to fall into defensiveness and feel as though you're being attacked, especially if you're the child who is now an adult and you've likely been told what to do by your parent for your entire life.

It's important for the older family member to initiate these conversations by clarifying that your feedback is solely to help them excel in their role and realize their full potential as a professional. Be as objective as possible and remember that what you've taught them as a parent doesn't always translate into how they behave as a professional.

When my mom and I were working together, we spent eight hours a day, five days a week together in the same office, but I would still get calls from her after hours and on the weekends to work through business matters. While some of these meetings were necessary, most of them were reactive and I eventually felt as though our relationship as mother and daughter was second priority to our relationship as business partners.

You can thrive as both professionals and as a family. But you must separate these roles from the beginning and decide how, when and why to communicate with one another.

4) Define how key decisions are made. The founder of a business has the most knowledge and experience to pull from when making pivotal decisions. However, if you are nearing the phase of succession planning in your agency, that expertise must be passed on to the next generation so that they have the foundation and confidence to make these decisions on their own.

There may be situations prior to succession where your family member is deeply involved in running the business and has the upper hand in terms of knowledge and foresight. However, as decision-making responsibility passes on to the next generation of agency leadership, it's paramount to have a conflict resolution strategy in place to prevent disagreement. You must decide which decisions will be left to whom moving forward.

When it comes to issues that involve the continuity of your business, it's almost always safest to involve a third-party mediator or adviser. Thinking about what will happen to your agency after you leave is an emotional thought process, and you don't want to make a decision that you will regret and will leave a family member feeling neglected.

When my mom and I were getting ready to sell our agency, we enlisted the help of a broker who also served as a liaison between the two of us to ensure that we both felt informed, acknowledged and prepared for the transition. Though it was still emotional, it helped us tremendously to receive feedback from an unbiased adviser who had both of our best interests in mind.

Navigating generational differences in family agencies is a delicate balance of respecting traditions while embracing change. It requires open communication, mutual respect and a clear understanding of each person's strengths and weaknesses. By focusing on these key elements, family agencies can thrive across generations, turning potential challenges into opportunities for growth and innovation.

Remember, the goal is to blend the best of all worlds, creating a dynamic, resilient and forward-thinking agency that honors its past while building its future.

Anais Babajanian is a business and leadership coach at Anais Babajanian Coaching, a coaching practice focused on helping small business owners bridge the gaps in their teams and operations.